In the olden days, a young girl and boy would be betrothed from a tender age. Before the girl even gets to the end of her puberty, she would be whisked off to be his wife. That was the only romantic relationship she knew.
Fast forward hundreds of years, times have changed. Most times, we have the ability to choose our life partners ourselves. (Thank goodness)
In the process of finding a partner suitable enough to spend the rest of our lives with, we meet the wrong ones and (if we are wise ) move on.
The question then is, why does the society seem to relish the idea of counting a woman’s past partners?
That is the question that begs to be answered with the surprising uproar that greeted the new Ooni of Ife’s choice of latest bride.
No sooner had the announcement of their marriage reached the public that some “angels of remembrance” arose from nowhere to list all her past relationships with some even insisting that she was still married.
I was shocked to come across a post on a site that gleefuly announced “hot gist” on the Olori.The hot gist turned out to be a list of her past lovers along with pictures. Staring at the pictures, all I saw was a woman who has been relationships that didn’t work out.
Though the sister of the Ooni has stepped out to explain the circumstances surrounding their marriage, still, this a classical reflection of what the average woman who doesn’t marry her first lover is faced with.
I know a lady who once told me she had to, by all means, marry her abusive boyfriend. I said why, she said “o you know what people will say? That I am hoping from one man to another! Wow.
Yes that’s what happens when we resort to keeping the list of women’s past lovers in our heads and unearthing them when they start a new one.
Think about it.
Maybe it’s time we stopped counting the ex-lovers of women
Writer – Josephine Stevens
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